It always seems as when life is going to well, stuff happens. Well, I guess not too well, but, maybe our luck ran out.... Ok, maybe luck is stupid. Ok, I don't know. All I know is that Dad's death blindsided us all. The chills still run down my spine as my mind reenacts the moment. The moment when his chest stopped rising and declining. How do you move on from that? How do you accept the life of being an orphan? What makes sense right now? Surely nothing. Jeremy may not have been my biological father, but he was more of a father to me since I was 13 years old. I don't know how I am supposed to move on....
This time around, Gabby was the one to handle all the funeral arrangements. I know that Lance wanted to handle them... not everyone can handle such a--- it's just hard.
As Gabby was at the grave site and Lance was at home with the kids, I went to visit a friend. It pains me to have to do this, but I know I must. This is long over do.
*rings bell*
I relieved all the parties, group hang outs, dinners, and movie nights. What type of person am I? Lance... Lance is the love of my life. How many people are fortunate enough to marry their best friend and it actually work out? We have two wonderfully flawed children and he has given me the life of my dreams!
Waiting must have been invented as a torture device. The inventor must have known that the device would never cease to exist. Who am I as a person? How would people that I actually know describe Mimi? She would never do anything to actually hurt the ones she loves the most. She loves to be creative. That Mimi is a great mother!
"Hey."
"Hey Mimi! How are you? Come in. Come in."
"Thanks, but I'm not staying long. I just came by to talk."
"Sure, is everything ok?"
"I'm just going to cut to the chase. I think you can guess why I'm here. Well, I know that we have a past, but, I can't play this game anymore. I love my husband and family more than is comprehensible. I know that we were interested in one another, but we need to be only friends."
I know that I came on really strong, but all I could think about was if Dad had ever found out about my complication, I would never be able to forgive myself.
"Are you going to say something?" I asked nervously. Was I to direct? Did I offend him? Of course I did!
"Well... one thing is... we knew this day would happen sometime, and now that time has come. I don't know what has initiated this and I don't know what you expect me to say! We were never officially dating, but we had something great, Mimi. I've had to wait and watch you live a life, that should be our life together, in the hope that you would wake up and realize how much you care about me."
I hate long awkward silences....
"Stupid me for thinking you would leave everything for me.... Look, I need some time... to.... I just need time."
These pauses are killing me!
"I totally get it.... Sorry it never worked out with us. I just can't go behind Lance's back anymore. Good night."
I turned and left, knowing that that was one of the hardest things I had to do, but completely the right thing....
When I got home, Gabby was.... being Gabby, Marcus had fallen asleep and Kayla was reading in her room. So, I settled in the living room with Lance.
"Hey beautiful." Lance was very sullen as he stared off into the distance.
"Hey babe, what are you thinking about?"
"When mom passed... seems like it was just yesturday...."
"I know sweetie.... I know."
"Hey, where did you go anyway?"
"Oh no where. No where honey," I said as I rested my head on his shoulder.
Today was pretty dull, but life, for some odd reason, had to go on. Marcus need changing food and just care in general. Kayla needed help with counting in math and needed someone to talk to and had to be told to make her bed.
Lance made extra time appear each day so that he could have as much time as he wanted to paint. He would wind his brunch back, release and send the paint flying onto that expensive paper. He painted some pieces and destroyed others. I wanted to tell him to lay some tarp down in the office if he wanted to go crazy, but instead I went Sim Depot and bought paint.
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A year later and I can finally say that life once again feels like life again. I mean what is life? The writer in me wants to define and know everything. Dictionary.com defines it as "the sum of the distinguishing phenomena of organisms,especially metabolism, growth, reproduction, and adaptation to environment." Adaptation. Adaptation is key. How else did I get used to being a best friend? Being a daughter? Being a Wife? Being a Mother? Being a Writer?
The Tanner's have adapted to life without it's glue, Jeremy. But, you know what? I think I'm-- we're going to make it. Kayla loved hearing all the stories of how great a cook her grams was, so she has set out to carry on the legacy. I've never seen a kid beg for a stove like this one did. Not a bike, not a Barbie, but a stove. So, Lance and I finally gave in and bought her one.
Today is Marcus' birthday and it has been the most exciting day in a long while. We, Gabby, Lance and I, all decided to throw Marcus a party. It would be good to have some friends around and also to just celebrate life. I even invited my brother Ruben to the party. I never realized how excited Kayla would be to have her uncle attend! Ruben and I have grown a lot closer through the death of dad. I really appreciate how he has been there for me in the recent months. Adaptation.
Well, it's cake time! My baby! He is turning 5 years old! I can't believe it! Aww...
"Baby are you about to cry?? Aww, come on!" Lance asked.
*sniff sniff*
"No..."
"You promised!"
"I'm fine. I'll be fine. I promise," I said drying my eyes.
"Come on daddy! Marcus wants to blow out the candles! Hurrry!" Kayla spoke excitedly.
"Uh huh. You just want cake! You and your aunt!" Lance looked over at Gabby who was eyeing the cake with all that was in her.
I stand here in the window watching as my kids, 8 and 5, rush off to school. When did they get so big. I'm nervous about them being in school. Things are going to different now that dad isn't here to be my District Superintendent. But I think I'm a big girl and can handle the big bad teachers! :-) Adaptation.
Around lunch time I took a break from writing, and worrying, to go eat some leftover pizza. Unlike my roommate from university, I love left over pizza. A quick zap in the microwave or in the oven, and I'm on cloud 9.
After the kids left for school, Lance and Gabby rolled out of bed and got ready to go perform around town. I was glad they were finally getting Micky D's going again. It took awhile, but hey, better late than never!
"Kids, come on down! It's time to work on your homework!"
"Yes mom! Coming," retorted Marcus.
"And what about the first kid I birthed?"
.... jeopardy theme song....
"Here I am! Your favorite of all!" Kayla said as she finished running down the stairs.
"Uh huh. Go get to work smarty pants."
Kayla gave me a huge mischievous grin and danced into the dinning room.
*
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***
"Hey hun, what up?"
"Nothing mom. Just sitting here realizing how great being 13 is. Like, who needs to be 14 anyway? 14 is not as legit as 13."
"Well dear, technically you've been 14 for about... 13 hours now. You should have thought about this yesterday so that you could go the land of OZ and stop your birthday from happening!" I said giving my confused child a huge grin.
I know it's pretty much the norm for a parent to wonder where the time has disappeared to, but I think I should be an anomaly. It feels like two weeks since Kayla became a child.... *sigh* As long as I don't have to deal with a whole lot of drama, I think I'll make it through these teen years! We'll see....
"Very funny mom. I love middle school and all my friends. Who needs high school anyway? It's overrated."
"Well any girl who knows that words deserves to be in high school. And what about all the fun you are going to have now that you're only going to have 4 classes instead of 8. You'll have more time for lunch and get out earlier. There will be new friends to make and memories that will last a lifetime. Then there is the shopping and the driving of--"
"Really I'll be able to drive!?!"
I laughed at the thought of my 14 year old driving, " Well, not at the moment, but you will be able to in the future. You'll love it. Now come blow out your candle, please! I want cake!" I said fluttering my eyelashes.
The next day, my baby girl, left for school all grown up. Oh man her first day of high school. What was I thinking!?!? There was no way I should have let her out of my sight? Well, I mean at least for high school. Oh, I got it! I'm going to home school her! Give her house arrest jewelry and hire a bouncer! Adaptation.
Kayla's first day as an "adult", and she wanted to spend it like a grown up. So, she asked if she could play darts and go to movies with some friends, without myself or dad. She said that's how adults do it. I said, yes you can play darts with your father and be driven to movies and be an adult with a 10pm curfew. Haha I love my job!
Kayla wanting to get out and have some fun reminded me how much I know how to have a good time with my sexy husband! Why did it take a 14 year old to remind me? Shame. So, the next night I spent time with my hubby at a lounge. But, I think he forgot that you are not supposed to keep your woman waiting? Tisk tisk tisk
At home, Gabby was keeping my wonderfully special children under a tight leash. Go Gabby!!
I am not exactly a fan of tabloids, but when you see your own face on the cover, you begin to take notice of the magazine rack on a regular to see is you are the next victim. So, when I was at the grocery store and saw Lance on the cover, I knew the time had come again for the Tanner's to be a target. What was it this time? I picked it up to skim and find out. Lance was accused of peeing himself in public. The absurdity of that accusation! As soon as I texted and told Lance, he rushed off to City Hall to handle the accusations.
Well done my love. Even though it cost a few hundred simoleons, we still came out on top with the settlement. That's what they get for going after the Tanners.
So, one day, I walked into the office to see the computer taken. At first glance I thought I was imagining things, but then I realized that it was Kayla typing away for real, not my imagination.
"This is a surprise!"
Kayla turned around to see who was talking to her, "oh hey mom. I hope you don't mind. I'm just blogging some stuff that I had on my mind. Do you need to use the computer?"
"Well, since you're writing, how can I possibly keep you from that?"
Kayla's face lit up with satisfaction that she had my approval.
"Let me know when you're done Kay."
Woa, my daughter is writing? That's a shocker. Well, I guess like mother like daughter.
Adaptation.
So, I can officially say, again, that my kids are so intellectual. They are watching the news? What is this world coming to?
So, after Marcus was done watching tv with hi sister, he decided he was hungry and basically just went and made himself some food. I heard him whistling as he made some muffins and had to confirm it with my own two eyes. My little chef!
Since I was never really close to my father, when the Tanners came into my life, they were a God sent. Jeremy came and swept me off my feet as the dad of my dreams! Of course my own father was not as excited, but that's his business. Now the only dad I have, or had, was Jeremy. When I see Lance and Kayla together, I get butterflies in my stomach. I recall all my favorite memories of dad and I. It's amazing that just because I wasn't as close to my own father that it was no factor in how close Lance and Kayla are. Life is so amazing!
Even better still is how close Kayla and Marcus are. The weekends are the best, because they have more time in the day to just run around and play outside. Normal kids stuff. Now that Kayla is getting older, they are able to leave and go places around town as long as they are back at a curfew.
Another great part about the weekends is the amount of time I have to work on my books. I am currently on my third novel and it's so much fun! Well, as much fun as deadlines can be; but when my brain gets going and my fingers get typing, there is no stopping me!
Kayla has been making a lot of friends at school, so she usually squeezes them in on the weekends since her weekdays are so busy. Like her father, that girl can create time. I have no idea how she can get so much done with family, friends, hobbies, homework and chores. Teenagers these days! Are they out to conquer the world?
For me, I keep things simple. I write, write, chill with the family, take care of the house and the squeeze in some me time. The best me time is spent at the spa! Oh yea!
Sadly, Lance was at the park playing his guitar when he witnessed someone's death. Not exactly what someone needs who just lost their last living parent, but time does heal all wounds. He came home and told me about the incident, and reassured me he was ok. Surprisingly I believed him. There was sincerity in his eyes that spoke truth. It's been year and time has shown its power of making sadness disappear.
I often feel bad that I am not as good a cook as Gabby is, but I just wasn't born with the Tanner cooking gene. I don't know how it works, but the Tanner ladies are chefs. Not just great cooks, but they are amazing chefs! Gabby can make the most amazing peach cobbler that I've ever tasted. I mean, ever! I know that she never wanted to do it professionally, but one thing is sure, she brings the family together for dinner.
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I must be an old lady because Marcus is turning 14 tomorrow. I feel like I just went through this! Since today is Sunday, we figured we would throw our little party animal his party today instead of tomorrow night. Marcus is such a party-a-holic! Always begging to attend a party, no matter whose it is, or to have one here at the house. Well, we couldn't possibly say no to a birthday party! Let's party on! Wooo! Partaaay!
Well, successful party! With a good crowd and a fun night, it was a success. I am glad to close one chapter of my life and open another. With the Marcus a freshman in high school and Kayla a junior, it's about to be the hubby and I and Gabby. Dictionary.com defines adaptation as: the act of adapting. Some synonyms are: adjustment, modification, refitting, transformation, and variation. In my 17 years of being a parent I have learned that adaptation is crucial to living life. Not going through the motions, but actually living. I think that's why those smart people put that in the definition of life. I've had to adjust to whatever came my way. Some events threatened my sanity and or my comfort bubble. But most importantly refitting my plans is what helped me and helps me to be content and happy through it all. I look forward for the next heir to the Tanner Legacy to leave their mark on Twinbrook. LG, life's good. :-)
.... and generation 3 begins!
The End!
Thanks for reading guys! Go to the Tanner Legacy Heir poll to cast your vote on who you think should be the next heir to this amazing legacy! Also don't forget to recommend this part.
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